heretic-dreams

Grandmother said: be a pillar of stillness.\n\n<<display "fight">>

"You call it meditation if you want," <<$loverpronoun>> says. "I call it a death wish. You think we'll be able to do the proper rites out here if you die? No."\n\n<<display "tanisha">><<endreplace>>

<<$Lovertheir>> hand slides down your side, briefly resting on your hip in a proprietary fashion.\n\n<<display "bed">>

They slap you on the back and make fun of you, but soon the cheer dissipates and your lover gets to <<$lovertheir>> feet.\n\n"Volunteers for the damaged tent," <<$loverpronoun>> says.\n\nSome of the miners who slept in the warmer tent last night raise their hands. Some don't.\n\n[[Raise|dream2][$sleep = "warm"]] | [[Stay|dream2][$sleep = "cold"]]

Before the miners turn in, your lover sings a burnt-orange, sweet-spice song of home. <<$Lovertheir>> voice was what pulled you to <<$loverthem>> first: that and <<$lovertheir>> <<cyclinglink "smile." "jawline." "eyes." "arms." "scars." "hair.">>\n\nLater <<$loverpronoun>> sings again, soft, as you [[drift|intermission2]] in and out of sleep.

<<cyclinglink "Fast" "Slow">> kisses, and then more, and then breathing together in the [[dark.|before]]

Lynni's in the snow, staring up at nothing. As soon as you touch him he stops screaming and stares somewhere beyond you.\n\n"There were teeth," he says distinctly, and laughs, and thrashes.\n\nHe's struggling hard, but a couple of the miners help haul him into a tent. He chokes out sobs but at least you can wrap him up while you wait for the storm to [[die.|stormend]]

Once, you stayed outside the tents too long and someone found you, bundled you inside and laid blankets over your stiffened body. Nearly died, they said, though there was no nearly about it.\n\n<<display "lover">>

You [[dream|dream1b]] of the <<$god>>.

You prepare for another dream, but you find only your thoughts, and [[waking|morning]] to a pale clear morning.

Before <<$loverpronoun>> was your lover, <<$loverpronoun>> leaned back in <<$lovertheir>> chair in a warm room and looked you up and down bold and smiling.\n\nLater <<$loverpronoun>> said: "You want to go to my room?"\n\nLater <<$loverpronoun>> said: "My crew needs a pathfinder."\n\nAnd you answered with your fingers and tongue and you were tumbling into something <<cyclinglink "but it didn't matter" "and that was the thrill of it" "and something in you regretted it" "but you couldn't stop yourself">> and now when you watch <<$loverthem>> you're [[tugged|attack]] toward <<$loverthem>> as if by a thread.

Tanisha subsides into sullen silence.\n\n<<display "bottle">>

Tanisha's with the dogs, trying to calm them, but they need someone with less fear in their voice. Lynni's screaming. Revekah's corralled a group of miners to anchor the tents.\n\nYou need to help someone.\n\n[[Tanisha|thelp]] | [[Lynni|lhelp]] | [[Revekah|rhelp]]

People used to swim in the lake and come here for their health, but these days skin blisters if it touches the water too long. Now few travel so far: only miners wearing heavy gloves to dredge for the precious salts.\n\n<<display "salts">>

<<if visited ("loveaway")>>Stumbling<<else>>Crawling<<endif>> to your lover, you lean against <<$lovertheir>> chest.\n\n<<if $godfight gt 2>>Breathing. <<$Loverpronoun>>'s [[breathing.|grip]]<<set $loversurvive = 1>><<else>>Not breathing, and <<$lovertheir>> lips are [[cold.|intermission5]]<<endif>>

Heretic Dreams

<<if $tanishadead is 0>>The god's delight is a tremble in the air.\n\n<<display "godfightlose">><<else>>The god's uncertainty [[roars|godfightchance]] in your ears.<<endif>>

You huddle together, Revekah against your back. She's shaking, but says nothing. The air chills you even through your coat.\n\n<<display "dream1">>

<<$Loverpronoun>> grips your hair and rasps: "I feel like I was run over by a tram. Grab my hand?"\n\nWords are difficult, after all this.\n\n[[Help|lovehelp]] | [[Kiss|lovekiss]]

When darkness falls, you [[gather|sing]] in the largest tent once again.

Nothing but stars studding imaginary sky. Peaceful. Calm.\n\nYou pull out of your trance when your lover says something indistinct to the roof of the tent.\n\n<<display "askhush">>

<<$Lovertheir>> voice makes your eyes sting. One by one the others fall asleep, and your lover pulls you down beside <<$loverthem>>.\n\n"This job you've been strange," <<$loverpronoun>> murmurs, voice blurred. <<if $assist is 0>>"Normally you help out. But all you do is sit and close your eyes.<<else>>"You go blank, more than usual.<<endif>> What's happening?"\n\n[[Tell|lovertell]] | [[Lie|loverlie]]

It <<if $god is "Poisoner">>ran its power through rivers and fields and it drew sickness to itself like a blanket until only you were left standing.<<elseif $god is "Traitor">>pulled its worshippers into war they could not win, threw them at the enemy like waves breaking on cliffs and at the moment of defeat left them broken and lost.<<elseif $god is "Deceiver">>promised more to its worshippers than any other. Only this, only that, until the people had nothing but their bones, and then it took them too.<<endif>>\n\n[[No more.|night1]]

+++\n\n[[Play Again|Start][state.restart()]]\n\n+++\n\n<<display "sqDeparture">>\s\n\nMany thanks to Eleanor, Enrico, Fay, Phil and Suzan for testing\n\nMacros and CSS template by Leon Arnott

Afternoon.\n\nSnowfall, <<if $destination is "city">>making the ruins into pale hulking shapes<<elseif $destination is "forest">>blanketing the trees with silence<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>thick on the now-frozen water<<endif>>.\n\nThe <<$god>> did something like this before: <<if $god is "Poisoner">>monsoons and biting insects during what should have been the dry season<<elseif $god is "Traitor">>thunderstorms out of a clear winter sky and slippery mud waist-high<<elseif $god is "Deceiver">>parched mud followed by painful rain that stung eyes and burned skin<<endif>>.\n\nTanisha has a fever. Keeps talking to the ceiling of the tent.\n\n[[Heal|tanheal][$healtanisha = 1; $assist += 1]] | [[Meditate|tanmed][$godfight += 1]]

<<$Loverpronoun>> slides your glove back on and you lie <<cyclinglink "facing one another" "back to back" "tangled" "side by side">>, breathing in rhythm in the [[darkness.|before]]

You walk into the clear night. Past the ruined tents, half-buried. Past <<if $destination is "city">>what used to be the town hall and an expanse that must have been a park<<elseif $destination is "forest">>a cluster of spiny trees and a snow-laden iron bench<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>the frozen, reeking lakeshore and a wooden hut leaning sideways under the weight of snow<<endif>>.\n\nThe <<$god>> is [[waiting.|godconfront]]

"I don't think we're getting any <<$foodtaste>> out here," <<$loverpronoun>> murmurs, and coughs a weak laugh.\n\n<<display "lovego">>

Teeth and darkness back and forth behind your eyes: no wonder you don't sleep.\n\n<<display "loud">>

The miners pile into the two largest tents, arms slung around each others' shoulders, some shivering, some staring.\n\n<<if not visited ("here")>>Your lover stands and in <<$lovertheir>> strong musical voice lists the damage. <<if not visited ("thelp")>>Three dogs bolted, so supplies will need to be abandoned.<<endif>> <<if not visited ("rhelp")>>One tent blew away in the confusion.<<endif>> <<if not visited ("lhelp")>><<display "lynninohelp">><<else>>Lynni is sleeping finally, his breath deep and even.<<endif>><<else>>Your lover congratulates the crew on their efforts, but the dogs still bark every so often outside.\n\n<<display "lynninohelp">> There's no one to ask about him or the storm. Grandmother's long gone.<<endif>>\n\n"[[Sleep|intermission3]], if you can," your lover says. "We move in the morning."

Tanisha's directing the crew with military precision, making sure each tent has enough of the scant shelter.\n\n"There - no, there," she calls out, and tuts.\n\nThe tent you share with your lover sits in the middle and once you've set it up exhaustion hits. You could [[sleep,|sleep]] if not for the noise.

At the shrine, you knelt. You'd made your offerings: blood, flesh, memories. The <<$god>> was too greedy. You waited until it was sated and you <<cyclinglink "ripped" "ate" "stole">> a part of it for yourself.\n\nBut this time you cannot. It's too strong. If you dreamed, if you focused, maybe you could have overcome it.\n\nIf they ever find out, they will tell stories of what you have done.\n\n[[+++|end][selfdead = 1]]

<<$Loverpronoun>> may not care much about religion, but if <<$loverpronoun>> knew you'd lied to <<$loverthem>> all this time <<$loverpronoun>> would cast you out as soon as you reached a settlement. <<display "useful">>

The tentflap must have blown open in the night, letting in a drift of snow. <<if $healtanisha is 1>>Tanisha and <<else>>Tanisha lies half outside part-buried, her face twisted with pain and red staining the snow; <<endif>>the rest lie stiff and still. Your lover's eyelids flutter open and shut.\n\n[[Huddle|lovehuddle]] | [[Meditate|lovemed][$godfight += 1]]\n<<silently>><<set $tanishadead = 1>><<endsilently>>

Grandmother called it walking, but it's more like swimming through icy water. Your numb bare fingers spark no more.\n\n<<display "lover">>

Abandoning your quarry you dive to Tanisha, whose calf has a deep bleeding bite. You bind the wound tightly and she groans as you do it.\n\n"Thank you," she murmurs, before passing out.\n\nThe dogs lie dead or dying, and your lover [[calls]] for you all to regroup.

You tell your lover you're tired, that it's been a rough trip, that it was hard seeing people die, and it's <<replace>>all<<becomes>>all, technically,<<endreplace>> the [[truth.|dreamprep]]

You were already wearing your coat, you wouldn't have survived outside without, but the extra layer <<$loverpronoun>> threw at you will help during the day.\n\nGloves finally. Meditation needs bare hands, and your fingers slip, clumsy still.\n\n<<$Lovertheir>> irritation snapping away as quickly as it came, your lover helps you with the right glove. "You didn't sleep last night, either."\n\n[[Kiss]] | [[Explain]] | [[Evade|Lie]]

Grandmother said pathfinders were always solitary creatures, but then she always spoke like that.\n\nWhen she died you knew that the god <<cyclinglink "had taken its victory." "could not reach her." "would be taken down someday." "was incapable of stopping.">>\n\nMaybe someone will find you here, speculate endlessly about what happened.\n\n[[+++|end][$selfdead = 1]]

These nights it's been happening more and more. Waking from meditation, lightning sparks from your fingertips. The brief scent of electricity [[reminds|remember]] you <<replace>>who<<becomes>>what<<endreplace>> you are.

You lie beside your lover and press your mouth to <<$lovertheir>> face, warming <<$loverthem>> with your breath. <<$Loverpronoun>> says something indistinct against your skin.\n\n<<display "askhush">>

Your lover takes the bottle from you and swigs with a grimace. "That's terrible, Revekah, the hell did you get that from?"\n\nA scattering of laughter.\n\n<<display "food">>

Lynni throws the dogs chunks of reindeer meat. The dogs are much like the miners: muscular, friendly, excitable. He waves you over and pulls affectionately on the ears of the largest dog, who rears on her hind legs and tries to put her paws on his shoulders.\n\n"Stop it!" he says, laughing, and pushes her down. His voice is softer than the others'. "Are you tired?" he asks. "You better grab some [[sleep.|sleep]] I can finish up here."

<<$Loverpronoun>> must suspect something, and yet <<$loverpronoun>> keeps you with <<$loverthem>>.\n\nHard to know why. <<display "useful">>

Revekah's building a fire of dry dung and brush. "You're breaking my heart looking so tired," she says when you try to help. "Captain riding you hard, huh?"\n\nShe cackles.\n\n"I mean it, though," she says, sobering a little. "You [[rest|sleep]] tonight."

Back home, a god used to <<replace>>live.<<becomes>>exist.<<becomes>>be worshipped.<<endreplace>> It had a name, but you called it something else.\n\n[[Poisoner|god2][$god = "Poisoner"]] | [[Traitor|god2][$god = "Traitor"]] | [[Deceiver|god2][$god = "Deceiver"]]

Face me, it says.\n\n<<if $godknow is 1>>And it's known where you are, all this time. Known who you are and what you did.<<else>><<set $godknow = 1>>And you know with knifelike clarity: it's here, with you.\n\nAnd you can fight it, you just need more time.<<endif>>\n\nAnd you could obey, walk into the snow and never be seen again, so the <<$god>> can have you and leave the miners alone.\n\n[[Leave]] | [[Sleep]]

Morning. Snowfall again.\n\n<<if $sleep is "warm">>Part of the other tent came loose in the night, and Revekah and three more froze.<<elseif $sleep is "cold">>You wake to icy wind on your face and your lover dragging you upright. Revekah and three more froze during the night.<<endif>>\n\n"Plus side is," Tanisha says, <<if $tanishahealed is 0>>clammy and bright-eyed with fever and <<endif>>high laughter jerking out of her, "plus side is, there's room for all of us in the good tent."\n\nYour lover cuffs her.\n\n[[Laugh]] | [[Frown]]\n<<silently>><<set $revekahdead = 1>><<endsilently>>

You see none of the threads you usually follow, only yawning emptiness.\n\n[[Stand][$assist += 1]] | [[Stay][$godfight += 1]]

The <<$god>>'s voice vibrates in your head.\n\nStay and they die.\n\nBut if you sleep just a little longer, you can do it some damage.\n\n[[Leave]] | [[Sleep|day3]]

It burns down your throat and warms your belly.\n\n<<display "food">>

You yell stay at the dogs and they lie still on the ground, but not before Tanisha screams and you smell a burst of blood.\n\nYour lover [[calls]] the crew together.

Moments stretch and bend. <<replace>>Then.<<becomes>>Then.\n\nA grey flash of teeth in the dark.\n\nYou lash out blindly. Something snarls, and the next you know Tanisha's shaking you [[awake.|awake]] The storm is silent.<<endreplace>>

You may as well try to hurt it in death. You draw energy to yourself and burst it outward: a screech echoes through the <<if $destination is "city">>bones<<elseif $destination is "forest">>trees<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>ice<<endif>>.\n\n<<display "shatters">>

[[Ask|loveask]] | [[Hush|lovehush]]

When you wrench yourself out, Tanisha's is in front of you, grabbing your belongings and stuffing them into your pack.\n\n"Come. Come on, [[this way|come]]," she says, voice raw.

It's been that way ever since it happened. An echo, or simple lack of sleep.\n\n<<display "loud">>

Tanisha runs for the dogs, trying to calm them, but they're crazed and snapping. Lynni's screaming, choking out sobs. Revekah shouting at people anchoring the tents, but no one's listening.\n\nYou need to help someone.\n\n[[Tanisha|thelp]] | [[Lynni|lhelp]] | [[Revekah|rhelp]]

Tanisha calls thanks over her shoulder and dashes away.\n\nThe dogs are spooked, one of them snapping at another's heel. It's unlike them: they're used to storms.\n\nIf someone overhears, you can pretend it's an ordinary pathfinder thing. You speak to the dogs in their language. Down. Stay. Calm.\n\nAnd they listen. You guard them until the storm [[dies down.|stormend]]

You've been sharing dreams with the <<$god>> these past nights, and sharing its power for longer. Your mind can slither through its weaknesses. And its main weakness is greed: wanting the dead, wanting you.\n\n[[Fight|godfightwin][$fight = "fight"]] | [[Feint|godfightwin][$fight = "feint"]]

Hannah Powell-Smith

And the miners are so loud, shoulderbarging and backslapping and shouting over each other as they pack up the tents. Tanisha marshals them with her booming voice - up up up!\n\nYou and your lover stand a discreet distance apart. They all know, of course, but <<cyclinglink "you worry" "your lover worries">> that they'll cry favouritism. <<$Loverpronoun>>'s the leader of the crew, after all.\n\n"Pathfinder," <<$loverpronoun>> says to you, formal, distant. "What road have you seen?"\n\n[[Town|road][$destination = "city"]] | [[Forest|road][$destination = "forest"]] | [[Lake|road][$destination = "glacier"]]

Last night, before the lightning, the thread led to the <<if $destination is "city">>bone town to the north<<elseif $destination is "forest">>thick white forest to the east<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>lake filled with ice to the west<<endif>>. You and your lover lead the way: Tanisha drives the dogs behind you with the rest of the miners.\n\nSun [[rises|intermission1]] low over the snow.

Desperation lends you strength. Revekah tosses you a tent pole and you flail at the dogs as they rip tents and worry at sleeping bags.\n\nSomewhere in the melee, Tanisha screams. You smell blood.\n\n[[Attack|dogfight]] | [[Heal|dogheal]]

You're useful, true, but then so <<replace>>is<<becomes>>was<<endreplace>> Lynni.\n\nYou're not sure if that's a [[comfort.|comfort]]

During the night, the storm [[hits.|storm]]

<<$Lovertheir>> hand tightens on your arm as <<$loverpronoun>> rises.\n\n<<display "okay">>

<<$Loverpronoun>> follows at your heels.\n\n<<display "bed">>

The saltminers are stirring: their breathing changes and shifts in the neighbouring tents.\n\nYour lover darts to check through the tentflap and flings your outer clothes at you. "Do you think they're going to trust you if you end up half-frozen again?"\n\n[[Dress]] | [[Sit]]\n<<if $Loverpronoun is "Zie">><<set $loverpronoun = "zie">><<set $loverthem = "hir">><<set $Loverthem = "Hir">><<set $lovertheir = "hir">><<set $Lovertheir = "Hir">><<elseif $Loverpronoun is "She">><<set $loverpronoun = "she">><<set $loverthem = "her">><<set $Loverthem = "Her">><<set $lovertheir = "her">><<set $Lovertheir = "Her">><<elseif $Loverpronoun is "He">><<set $loverpronoun = "he">><<set $loverthem = "him">><<set $Loverthem = "Him">><<set $lovertheir = "his">><<set $Lovertheir = "His">><<endif>>

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Pathfinding is easy enough. Since you were small, threads have curled ahead when you closed your eyes.\n\nBut since the shrine you wake with sparks at your fingertips and hear people's heartbeats across an icefield. You [[knew]] it would get worse, but you didn't know it would happen this [[quickly.]]

They would call what you did <<replace>>heresy.<<becomes>>heresy.\n\nAnd they would be [[right.|waking]]<<endreplace>>

If your lover knew what you had done, would <<$loverpronoun>> still trust you to lie beside <<$loverthem>> at night?\n\n[[Yes|ytrust]] | [[No|ntrust]]

"Your trouble is," Grandmother said, <<replace>>once,<<becomes>>more than once,<<becomes>>again and again,<<endreplace>> "you don't know when to stop."\n\nIt didn't feel like a problem then, <<cyclinglink "but it does now." "and it still doesn't now.">> Maybe you're [[right.|blizzard]]

The second time you slept with your lover, <<$loverpronoun>> propped <<$loverthem>>self up on <<$lovertheir>> elbow and ran <<$lovertheir>> fingertips over your forehead.\n\n"What are you thinking?" <<$loverpronoun>> asked, and <<$loverpronoun>> didn't wait for an answer but instead kissed you, leaving you <<cyclinglink "deliciously distracted," "tense with worry," "wishing you could reply,">> and outside the window the sky slowly lightened.\n\n[[+++|end][$loverdead = 1]]

Your fingers tighten on your knees and you push yourself into the dark.\n\nA thread <<replace>>here?<<becomes>>here?\n\nNo.\n\n[[Here.|here]]<<endreplace>>

<<$Loverpronoun>>'s warm, so warm, but after a second <<$loverpronoun>> pushes you lightly away.\n\n<<display "okay">>

Tanisha yells through the tentflap. "Sun's almost up."\n\nYou [[haul|hauling]] your pack into the snow.

<<display "Leave">>

Closing your eyes against light and movement is nearly peaceful.\n\nYou gather yourself. Bring the sparking lightning closer - it burns, but with fierce power and a howl reverberates in your mind.\n\n<<display "evening">>

Your lover shrugs and lightly touches your shoulder. "Do sleep," <<$loverpronoun>> tells you, and ducks into <<$lovertheir>> tent.\n\nThe Shark constellation is bright tonight, though your [[lover|before]] and the miners call it the Spear.

<<set $godknow = 1>>Recognition buzzes in your mind like static.\n\nIt's the <<$god>>. Close by.\n\nAnd you can fight back. You've done it before, you just need more [[time.|fight2]]

The afternoon the mining begins, the dogs attack.\n\nGrey eyes. Sharp teeth.\n\nLynni's whispering and shaking, Tanisha's yelling, Revekah's hitting out with a tentpole. They snap but they're going for the tents rather than flesh.\n\n"Get them away!" shouts your lover.\n\n[[Attack|dogattack][$assist += 1]] | [[Calm|dogcalm][$assist += 1]] | [[Meditate|dogmed][$godfight += 1]]

You didn't see it coming. You didn't see it coming, and that never happens.\n\nYour lover dives out of the tent yelling at the miners. Wind races and dogs howl. People scream.\n\n[[Meditate]] | [[Assist][$assist += 1]]

Warmth, briefly, before <<$loverpronoun>> withdraws. <<$Loverpronoun>> puts <<$lovertheir>> hands firmly on either side of your face.\n\n"Meditating too much will kill you."\n\nIt's true. But <<$loverpronoun>> doesn't need to know that.\n\n<<display "tanisha">>

You've been beside <<$loverthem>> too long to leave.\n\n<<display "godfightchance">>

You tell your lover that the <<$god>> is here, that it wants you, that you let people die so you could gather the strength to fight, but <<$loverpronoun>> does not answer. <<$Loverpronoun>>'s [[asleep.|dreamprep]]

Arguing with your lover never goes well: <<$loverpronoun>> chases down what you say like a fox with a hare. But you distract <<$loverthem>> with logistics and practicality.\n\n<<$Loverpronoun>> bumps your shoulder as you roll your sleeping bag. "Look after yourself," <<$loverpronoun>> says roughly.\n\n<<display "tanisha">>

<<$Loverpronoun>> presses <<$lovertheir>> lips together and searches your face for two of <<$lovertheir>> heartbeats.\n\n<<display "bed">>

Her voice is raw and hoarse. "Come," she whispers. "The wind just [[dropped."|stormend]]

<<if $godfight is 0>><<if $fight is "feint">>You remain still until the very last minute, and you <<else>>You <<endif>>draw your energy to yourself, but it's not enough, not enough at all, and the <<$god>>'s brief pause was nothing but the calm before its emptiness [[crashes|shatters]] over you.<<else>><<if $fight is "feint">>You wait for the <<$god>> to advance, holding your breath. One heartbeat, two, three. In the second before it strikes, you <<else>>You <<endif>>pull energy from the air, from the dead, from your lover still breathing. And you [[fling|fling]] it.<<endif>>

It's been a year, nearly. And [[here|god]] you are as far from that shrine as you can get.

The wind whips away your voice and instead of calling again, your lover ducks out of the tent.\n\n<<cyclinglink $Loverpronoun "Zie" "She" "He">> shoots you a glare and tugs you by the hand.\n\n"Back in here before the [[others]] see you're up."

If you freeze here, the god can no longer use you. It'll stop hunting.\n\n[[Maybe.|lovedie2]]

"Come on. Bed. Busy day tomorrow."\n\nAn invitation behind <<$lovertheir>> words, and though it's [[tempting,|bedgo]] part of you would rather [[sit|bedsit]] and watch the sky.

From the tent, your lover calls your name.\n\n[[Whisper]] | [[Call]] | [[Return]]

Packed in tight, it's warm enough, though the breath and sweat of your fellow sleepers keeps you awake much of the night. Your lover's pressed against your back, arm over your side.\n\n<<display "dream1">>

<<$Loverpronoun>> pauses a moment, fixes you with a narrow look, and shakes <<$lovertheir>> head.\n\n"You carry on like this, you'll die, and then how will we know where to go?"\n\nBefore you can answer, <<display "tanisha">>

Your legs give out and your hands are still tingling with sparks or with cold and you've been staring at your fingers, and your lover hunkers down in front of you and pats your cheek with a gloved hand.\n\n"You're doing it again."\n\n[[Kiss|kiss3]] | [[Admit]] | [[Evade]]

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You stumble backwards and pull off your gloves, drawing your consciousness inward and trying not to listen to the snarling and snapping and strangled shouting.\n\nEmptiness<<if visited ("Meditate")>> again,<<endif>> [[swirling]] around you, but<<if visited ("Meditate")>> this time<<endif>> a pinprick of light [[shines]] in the distance.

Your voice rings out, pale and thin for a moment against the star-thick sky. Ducking out of the tent, your lover bundles you into the smoky warmth.\n\n<<cyclinglink $Loverpronoun "Zie" "She" "He">> hisses against your cheek. "You want the [[others]] to hear?"

You can almost touch the light with your mind and as it blazes hard behind your eyes, a shadow erupts within.\n\n<<display "fight">>

A vague smile flitters across <<$lovertheir>> face.\n\n<<display "lovego">>

You smell the salts close to the surface, and direct the crew to set up camp nearby. Your lover stands close, warm against your back.\n\n[[Lean]] | [[Face]] | [[Away]]

Going from the thin purity of the snow to the tent's smoky warmth of the tent thickens your throat.\n\n"Meditating again," your lover says. <<cyclinglink $Loverpronoun "Zie" "She" "He">> briefly checks your hands. "And cold. The [[others'll|others]] notice."

Revekah shouts to her crew. They can't hear but you can pass the message and it quickly travels through the crowd.\n\nThrough the shouting and chaos, the dogs howl. They never do that in a storm.\n\nYou huddle with the rest in the tents until the storm [[dies.|stormend]]

If you're going to do this, you're going to have to do it soon, whether you move [[away|loveaway]] from the camp or [[stay|lovestay]] near your lover. You're fading yourself.\n\nOr you could [[lie|lovedie]] here with <<$loverthem>>. At least die comfortable.

It feels like plunging underwater. A moment of everything compressing hard against your body, and then the cold air and the sounds of the night return.\n\nYou can [[breathe.|checklover]]\n<<silently>><<set $goddead = 1>><<endsilently>>

Bedraggled and exhausted, the crew arrives at <<if $destination is "city">>the arching ribs of the [[bone town.|bonetown]]<<elseif $destination is "forest">>the edge of the [[forest.|forest]]<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>the brimstone-smelling blue [[lake.|lake]]<<endif>>

Last night's owl is long gone, but weasels and mice rustle beneath the snow.\n\nYears ago aristocrats would holiday here and shoot reindeer, but the deer moved on and the aristocrats lost interest. Now miners come here to dig out precious salts, but that's all.\n\n<<display "salts">>

<<$Loverpronoun>> pushes you away unceremoniously and wipes <<$lovertheir>> mouth.\n\n"Later. We need to get going."\n\n<<display "tanisha">>

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"What," <<$loverpronoun>> says, speaking with effort. "What was this."\n\n<<$Loverpronoun>> doesn't seem to need an answer: <<$loverpronoun>> just stares at the dead and a shudder passes over <<$loverthem>>.\n\n"Okay." It's more of an exhalation than speech. "Okay. We need to get out of here."\n\n[[+++|end]]

<<if $godfight gt 0>>You have strength, but only a little. Not enough.<<else>>You have no reserves that could cause a god pain.<<endif>> Little but the memories of <<if $lynnidead is 0 and $revekahdead is 0 and $tanishadead is 0>>your home.<<endif>><<if $lynnidead is 1>>Lynni,<<endif>><<if $revekahdead is 1>>and Revekah,<<endif>><<if $tanishadead is 1>>and Tanisha and the rest,<<endif>><<if $lynnidead is 1 or $revekahdead is 1 or $tanishadead is 1>> and your home.<<endif>>\n\nIt speaks. Stand.\n\n<<if $godfight gt 0>>[[Fight|godfightnowin]] | <<endif>>[[Surrender|godsurrender]]

You hold yourself motionless and close your eyes.\n\n<<display "shatters">>

You start awake, sparks burning your fingers. No one pays you heed: they're murmuring, while Tanisha quietly groans. The dogs are quiet: you smell blood and meat.\n\nYour lover [[calls]] for you.

They call it heresy: instead they should call it [[temptation.|god]]

Confession tastes sour but you tell <<$loverthem>> you don't remember the last few minutes. Or much of the night before.\n\nYour lover's lips tighten with faint worry. "You remember what happened before you went out, right?"\n\nHeat. Friction. Sweat. Yeah, you remember that pretty well.\n\n<<display "tanisha">>

You swing at the dog's head and it caves: it falls sideways, scrabbling at the snow. You try to dispatch it quickly.\n\nThe rest of the dogs lie dead or dying. Tanisha groans gently, a couple of miners kneeling at her side.\n\nYour lover [[calls]] for the rest to regroup.

Everything [[shatters.|die]]

Night.\n\n<<if $destination is "city">>In the distance, bones spike the horizon, lit by moonlight.<<elseif $destination is "forest">>Little to be seen here, but you smell what passes for vegetation and, in the distance, an owl flutters.<<elseif $destination is "glacier">>You're nearing the lake: the air has become crisper over the day, and in the distance you hear creaking ice.<<endif>>\n\nWhile your lover barks orders to the crew, you help.\n\n[[Dogs]] | [[Fire]] | [[Tents]]

Revekah rolls her eyes and snatches back the bottle. "Whatever," she says. "If Captain doesn't want us to drink, <<$loverpronoun>>'ll say so."\n\nYour lover is silent.\n\n<<display "food">>

The others are distracted. You lay your hand on Tanisha's hot clammy forehead and close your eyes, and focus.\n\nHer breathing grows a little easier, but a white flash of the <<$god>> sparks behind your eyes.\n\n<<display "evening">>

A person, yes, you <<cyclinglink "think." "know." "hope.">>\n\nYou've sat outside too long, lost in [[pathfinding.|travels]] Even you cannot withstand the [[cold]] forever.

All the tents are damaged, several destroyed. <<if not visited ("dogcont")>>There's a chance the bodies of the dogs could be salvaged for meat. <<else>>The dogs lie cowed and silent. <<endif>>Tanisha's leg is in a bad way, <<if visited ("dogheal")>>but at least it's bound right.<<else>>and she occasionally wakes and whimpers.<<endif>> Lynni hugs his knees<<if not visited ("lhelp")>>, lips moving without sound<<endif>>.\n\nYour lover's face is grimmer than you've ever seen it. "We can't move till tomorrow," <<$loverpronoun>> says. "Volunteers to sleep in the worst tents. Hands up."\n\n<<$Loverpronoun>> raises <<$lovertheir>> hand. Revekah snorts. "Screw that," she says. "You die, we all die."\n\nShe and another cluster of miners raise their hands. Your lover meets your eyes and tilts <<$lovertheir>> head in a question.\n\n[[Raise|sleepcold][$sleep = "cold"]] | [[Stay|sleepwarm][$sleep = "warm"]]

Lynni ended up in the snow and he's alive, but lying staring at nothing.

Your eyes sting against the growing light. Gods need only starlight, but you're no god despite your [[dreams]], and too much light [[hurts]] when you've not slept.

No one knows if the ribs are bone or rock, but the name stuck. Once this was a real farming town, but now it's only miners who come out here to dig for the precious salts.\n\n<<display "salts">>

Morning. <<if $sleep is "cold">>Your face is numb.<<else>>Your lover's arm is warm on you.<<endif>>\n\n<<replace>>Snowfall.<<becomes>>Snowfall.\n\nYour lover's jaw is set. "We can't move in this."\n\nDuring the night Lynni disappeared leaving his sleeping <<if visited("lhelp")>>bag neatly folded<<else>>mat covered with illegible scratches<<endif>>, along with four others<<if visited ("dogcont")>> and the remainder of the dogs<<endif>>.\n\nThroughout the day, you [[huddle.|huddle]]\n<<silently>><<set $lynnidead = 1>><<endsilently>><<endreplace>>

Your lover lifts <<$lovertheir>> hand again, then shakes <<$lovertheir>> head and turns away.\n\n<<display "bottle">>